The Big 2-5, Or, I Hope My Children Inherit Their Father's Sense of Direction

So now I'm a quarter of a century old. T came home for lunch and brought me cashew chicken from my favorite Thai place, a cute card, a shiny rainbow-colored helium balloon which D.L.F. has claimed as his own, and a new watch.

BUT, before all that happened, I thought I would try taking the kids to a park that I had seen recently on one of my morning walks. We entered at one side of the park, had a good time playing on the toys, and then exited the other side of the park. I walked along at a good clip for a while until I saw a street sign and realized I was going in the wrong direction and was now over twenty blocks from home. By this time, I was completely turned around and didn't have any idea which way to go. I knew if I got to a major intersection, I could figure out where I was, but I didn't want to walk any farther in the wrong direction. So I did the only logical thing--picked up my cell phone and called T, hoping he could bail me out with Google Maps.

Me: Hi...ummm...are you in front of a computer?

T: No, why?

Me: Well...this is going to sound sort of silly, but I took the kids to a new park, and now I'm at (such-and-such street) and don't know which way to go.

T: Where's the sun?

Me: Um...I don't know. I guess it's kind of...up...and behind me.

T: Okay. Walk away from the sun and then take a right.

How does the man do it? His directions got me home without a hitch. However, now I know why I have never walked that direction with the double stroller (or any stroller, for that matter). 14 (bumpity, rumble, rumble, bump, ka-THUNK) of the 20+ blocks on the way home had no real sidewalks...just trampled down gravel and grass alongside the busy street. The vibrations actually put both kids to sleep, although I kept squeezing D.L.F.'s knee and telling him to wake up so he would still take his afternoon nap.

Three Things

I have been a little under the weather for the past couple of days, but I'm on the mend. I made chicken soup today, which seems to nourish both body and soul.

Cupcake rolled over from back to front yesterday for the first time and has been practicing that new skill a lot today.

Tomorrow is my 25th birthday.

Such a Sweetheart!

 

Cupcake is four months old today!

Tent

One of D.L.F.'s favorite birthday presents this year was a little tent given to him by a boy in our church who had outgrown it. T set it up in D.L.F.'s room. We put all the balloons from his party in the tent. D.L.F. wanted T to come in and share the fun, so T managed to squeeze in there with him (no small feat, considering that T is 6'4")!

 

 

 

D.L.F.'s First Ice Cream

Here are some pictures from D.L.F.'s 2nd birthday party. It was his first time eating ice cream. Please excuse the dorky T-shirt. We always use one of T's old T-shirts over D.L.F.'s clothes as a bib whenever he eats, but I would have taken it off for pictures if I'd thought about it in time! Picasa will only let me post four pictures to Blogger at a time, so I will have to put some more up in another post.

Ice cream? Hmm...what's that?

 

Oh! It's kinda cold...

 

But I like it!

 

The Birth Survey

If you have given birth in the last three years, you are invited to take The Birth Survey here.

Here is a quote from the web site:

Our goal is to give women a mechanism that can be used to share information about maternity care practices in their community while at the same time providing practitioners and institutions feedback for quality of care improvement efforts.

At the heart of the project is an on-going, online consumer survey, The Birth Survey, that asks women to provide feedback about their birth experience with a particular doctor or midwife and within a specific birth environment. Responses will be made available online to other women in their community who are deciding where and with whom to birth. Paired with this experiential data will be official statistics from state departments of health listing obstetrical intervention rates at the facility level.

Yet Another Reason to Avoid Hormonal Birth Control

This story makes me sad. A 22-year-old mother of one died from a blood clot in her lung which may have been caused by the hormonal birth control method she was using (NuvaRing).

Hormonal birth control methods (ALL of them, as far as I understand--every brand and variety), as well as IUDs (both hormonal and copper) have the potential to prevent the implantation of a fertilized egg in a woman's uterus. If life begins at conception (and I believe it does), then that is abortion.

Here are a couple of informative sites:

A Short Condensation of Does the Birth Control Pill Cause Abortions?

The Pill Kills

What I Was Doing 2 Years Ago

It's D.L.F.'s 2nd birthday tomorrow! Here is his birth story, if you missed it the first time around (it's slightly graphic, because, it's, well, you know, birth):

At 1:30 A.M. on Saturday, August 26 (one day before Baby’s official due date), I got out of bed to use the bathroom and discovered a bit of clear liquid trickling down my legs. I tested it with a nitrazine strip and found that it was amniotic fluid. It was the first sign in my body of any progression toward labor, and I was so excited I couldn’t go back to sleep for quite some time. Later that day, I began having bloody show. (I didn’t lose any more amniotic fluid until the pushing stage of labor.)

I began having contractions around 10 PM on Saturday. They didn’t seem much worse than bad menstrual cramps. I thought, wow, this isn’t so bad after all. I went to sleep, but woke up with a contraction every forty-five minutes or an hour all night.

Throughout Sunday, the contractions gradually got closer together. By nighttime, they were eight to ten minutes apart and extremely strong and painful. I mainly felt them in my lower back. Every time a contraction would start, I would start the timer, get on my hands and knees, and Hubby would rub my lower back for me, while one or both of us sang a few lines from whatever song came to mind to help distract me. We went back to sleep for eight to ten minutes until the next contraction started, and then went through the process again, all night long.

By Monday morning, I was pretty tired, but I assumed Baby would be arriving sometime that day, so I tried to stay cheerful and positive. Hubby and I finished packing our bags and gathering snacks for the birth center. We went for a walk at a park, which helped to bring the contractions closer together. By lunchtime, the contractions were four or five minutes apart. We called the midwives, and they told us to come on over to the birth center.

Hubby drove, of course. We took the freeway, and traffic was light, so we got to the birth center in about ten minutes. I only had one contraction along the way, but it was very uncomfortable to get through in a sitting position.

We arrived around 1:30 P.M. I was the only woman in labor when we arrived, so I was able to get the birth suite of my choice: a pink, feminine room with a double-wide birth tub. The midwives asked me a few questions and then allowed us to get settled in. They checked on us periodically to see if there was anything we needed, but for the next few hours, they mostly left us to labor on our own.

At 5:15 P.M., the supervising midwife asked if she could check my cervix. Because I was still pretty calm and collected, she was amazed to find that I was already 8 centimeters dilated. She told me I could get into the birth tub if I wanted. Hubby and I got in together and turned on the jets. The warm water and the jets really helped dull the pain of contractions. Hubby stayed in the water with me for a couple of hours, rubbing my lower back with each contraction. Then he got out, but he still came over to rub my back every time I had a contraction. The pain in my lower back was excruciating. I didn’t realize at the time that the baby was posterior, so all the contractions I had experienced to this point were “back labor.”

I really lost track of time after that, and with all the endorphins coursing through my system, I got a little spacey. I really wasn’t thinking clearly, and absolutely all I could focus on was the contractions. As it was getting dark outside, Hubby and I went for a walk around the block. I had two or three contractions along the way, which were hard to deal with after the milder birth tub contractions. I got back in the birth tub for a while, and then forced myself to get out and labor on the bed for a while, as I was concerned that the birth tub contractions weren’t “doing enough,” because they were nowhere near as painful as contractions outside the water. I was frustrated that I still felt no urge to push, and I was getting extremely tired.

I think the supervising midwife could tell at that point (around 4 AM on Tuesday) that I was becoming somewhat discouraged, so she took over. She had me lie on my side for contractions (even though I told her lying on my side hurt the worst), and put a “husband” back-support cushion between my legs, so that they were spread about two feet apart. She spoke soothingly during contractions, reminding me to keep my legs wide open to make room for the baby, which was difficult, as I just wanted to clamp them together to help deal with the pain. It was during this time that the baby finally rotated to a face-down position and I began to feel the urge to push. Also, I felt a lot of wetness between my legs and had the fleeting thought that the amniotic sac must have broken. I did a few gentle experimental pushes, but not too hard, because I wasn’t sure if I was really supposed to be pushing yet.

After a while, the midwife checked my cervix again and said it was at 10 centimeters, and that I was free to push. This was encouraging news. I thought that I would give a few pushes and the baby would be out. I pushed on my hands and knees on the bed for a while. After maybe half an hour, I felt something start to slip out a tiny bit, and Hubby said he saw some membrane. One of the midwives suggested that I try sitting backward on the toilet to push, so I did. Hubby sat on a chair behind me, and with each push, I alternated between squeezing his knees as hard as I could and scratching and pounding the wall with my hands. I couldn’t help screaming with every push. After pushing on the toilet for about half an hour, I returned to the birth tub, where I was determined to be done with labor and meet my baby. I pushed super hard and fast on my hands and knees, and the baby was born in the water at 6:44 A.M. I heard Hubby exclaim, “Baby!” with astonishment and relief in his voice, and I knew I was done. One of the midwives immediately scooped the baby up and placed it on my chest. Hubby asked if it was a boy or a girl. He had to ask a couple of times, because I was too engrossed in just staring at the baby’s adorable face and marveling that the baby was finally outside me. Finally I processed what Hubby was asking, looked, and announced, “It’s a boy!” We greeted him, using the name we had chosen early in pregnancy for a boy.

Baby Boy’s head was perfectly round and not cone-shaped (thanks to my “roomy pelvis,” as the midwives put it), and his Apgar scores were 10 and 10. After a few moments of holding him in the tub, Hubby and the midwives helped me over to the bed, where I continued to hold Baby Boy to my chest. I was amazed how his sucking instinct kicked in right away, and that he was able to snuggle up to my breast and know what to do.

After a couple of pushes, the placenta came out, which felt good, as it was such a huge relief of pressure. After the cord stopped pulsing, Hubby cut it. The midwives left us alone for a while to bond with our baby. Later, the head midwife did an exam on me and found that I had torn pretty badly and needed stitches. Hubby gave Baby Boy his first bath and dressed him. Then we were given a breakfast menu from a nearby restaurant, and we both ordered omelettes.

Eventually, I got stitched up, and then Hubby and I watched the midwives gave Baby Boy his newborn exam. He was found to be normal and healthy. He was 7 pounds, 14 ounces (the exact same birth weight as his papa), and 21 1/8 inches long. His hair is light brown and his eyes are dark blue, at least for now.

Around noon, my parents came by the birth center for a few minutes to meet Baby Boy. Shortly after that, Hubby and I and our new baby went home.

I am very grateful to have given birth in a birth center instead of in a hospital. If I had been in a hospital, I’m sure the doctors would have wanted to give me drugs to help speed things up, as it was such a long labor, or pressured me to have an epidural and episiotomy. I was determined to have a natural birth with no interventions if at all possible, and I am pleased to say that I did, even though it was difficult. Baby Boy was very alert and content after his birth as a result of not being drugged up. I feel like he is my precious reward for all the hard work of labor. We prayed for this baby, and now we hold him in our arms. Thank You, Lord.

(Originally published September 2, 2006)

Like Father, Like Son

You know your husband is a geek nerd multimedia technician when you hear him singing to your son, "You can't brush your teeth with a network cable...."

The Beach

We took a family trip to the beach today. It was D.L.F.'s first time, and he loved the waves! In fact, he even roared at them (I think that's a compliment coming from him). He was sad when it was time to go, but we got cleaned up (D.L.F. was drenched from head to toe!) and then went to lunch at a seafood restaurant right on the beach. The kids slept all the way back home.

Family Antics

We managed to make it to storytime at the library today in between rain showers. D.L.F. is really getting into doing the motions of songs and rhymes. Ah, library. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. Not really. I talk about the library enough as it is. But it's still my favorite use of tax dollars.

D.L.F. loves to help me wake up Cupcake. When I say it's time, he rattles the doorknob (with childproof cover) until I get there and open the door, then he runs into her room, grabs the side of the playpen where she sleeps, and says (loudly), "HI, BABY (her name)! DO YOU WANT SOME MAMA MILK?" Cupcake loves her big brother and doesn't seem to mind this rude awakening. She just smiles up at him. She is almost always happy and content and just takes things as they are and accepts them (even when D.L.F. roars at her, she just stares at him unflinchingly. When D.L.F. does this, he is just trying to be sweet and include her in his games. His favorite thing in the world right now is when he and T chase each other around the house on hands and knees ROARING at each other like lions.)

Also, I don't know how it started, but we've all started saying "ooga booga" to each other just to be silly. Sometimes D.L.F. will be in one room, stop what he's doing and pause as if suddenly struck by inspiration, and say, "Say 'ooga booga' to Baby (her name)!" Then he'll run to whatever part of the house she's in, get right in her face, and say, "ooga booga!" She thinks this is funny and laughs at him. I never knew it would be so fun to have two. I'm looking forward to having more children (eventually). We've even got some good names picked out already.

Staying Humble

The parking spaces at our apartment complex are extremely narrow. The problem is compounded by the fact that, although the spaces are clearly marked "compact," many of the vehicles parked there are anything but. I've had to get in through the passenger's side and slide and shimmy over to the driver's side on multiple occasions because someone parked too close. What makes this even trickier is that something is wrong with the passenger's side lock, so our keys don't work in it--the car can only be unlocked from the driver's side. So even if I'm planning to get in the passenger's side and crawl through, I still have to manage to wedge my hand in the driver's side far enough to hit the automatic lock to open the rest of the doors. At least once when I was pregnant I had to call T to back the car out for me because there was no way I could get in on either side.

Practically every time I need to drive somewhere I have to think skinny thoughts and plaster myself to the car in order to get in. So imagine the thrill in my heart when I went out to the parking lot yesterday morning and saw, much to my delight and relief, that there was no car parked to the left of ours! I would be able to walk straight up to it and get in a completely calm, dignified manner! I giddily flung open the door (you understand my joy if you've ever had long-term parking issues), and proceeded to bash my bicep on the doorframe and tumble awkwardly into the seat. No one saw that, right?

Our Family

 

Were It Not For Grace

This song has been running through my head today. It's a good reminder that: "Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy, He saved us," and "For it is by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God" (from Titus 3 and Ephesians 2).

I've been thinking today how my life could have gone a completely different direction as a result of difficult circumstances in my past plus my own sin and foolishness, but God graciously had a better plan for my life and rescued me from a life without Him. Thank You, Lord, for saving me.

Were It Not For Grace

Time measured out my days
Life carried me along
In my soul I yearned to follow God
But knew I'd never be so strong
I looked hard at this world
To learn how heaven could be gained
Just to end where I began
Where human effort is all in vain

Were it not for grace
I can tell you where I'd be
Wandering down some pointless road to nowhere
With my salvation up to me
I know how that would go
The battles I would face
Forever running but losing this race
Were it not for grace

So here is all my praise
Expressed with all my heart
Offered to the Friend who took my place
And ran a course I could not start
And when He saw in full
Just how much it would cost
He still went the final mile between me and heaven
So I would not be lost

-by Larnelle Harris

T and Me

I found this meme on Stephanie's blog, Sojourner in a Strange Land. I thought it was cute and unique, so here goes:

1. Who is your man? T...philosopher, poet, and connoisseur of all things geeky

2. How long have you been together? 4+ years

3. How long dated? dated 5 months, engaged for 6 months after that

4. How old is your man? 32, almost 33

5. Who eats more? I do, especially when I'm pregnant or nursing (which has been most of the time we've been married!)

6. Who said "I love you" first? T

7. Who is taller? T is 6'4"; I'm 5'5".

8. Who sings better? I do.

9. Who is smarter? He is.

10. Whose temper is worse? Mine.

11. Who does the laundry? I do.

12. Who takes out the garbage? He does.

13. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? If you're standing at the foot of the bed, he's on the right.

14. Who pays the bills? He pays all the online bills. I write the rent check each month.

15. Who is better with the computer? Definitely T.

16. Who mows the lawn? We don't have a lawn.

17. Who cooks dinner? I do.

18. Who drives when you are together? He does.

19. Who pays when you go out? He does.

20. Who is most stubborn? Well, we're both pretty stubborn, but honestly, T is right about things more often than I am, so I usually end up giving in when I see he's right.

21. Who is the first to admit when they are wrong? He is.

22. Whose parents do you see the most? Mine.

23. Who kissed who first? Our first kiss was at the altar.

24. Who asked who out? He asked me out, but...I think I made it embarrassingly obvious that I liked him (another story for another day, or maybe not!)

25. Who proposed? He did, at the beach, on a ledge overlooking the water. He planned everything out to the second (literally). There was music, sparkling cider, a red rose, a beautiful poem he had written, my engagement ring in a special box....it was very romantic!

26. Who is more sensitive? I am.

27. Who has more friends? It's probably about equal.

28. Who has more siblings? We each have one sibling.

29. Who wears the pants in the family? T does.

30. How did you meet? I was in college and he was in seminary at the same school. I was a singer in a small ensemble, and he was the sound guy. The group often went to a restaurant after our Sunday-evening concerts. One night I sat by him and listened to him talk about his master's thesis he was working on. Wow, I thought, he is really smart, and godly, and funny. I want to marry someone like him! So I did! :-)

A Few Recent Photos

 

 

 

 

Just Like Papa

D.L.F. loves to imitate T. The other day D.L.F. decided he was ready for dinner (even though it wasn't done cooking yet), so he climbed up into his high chair and prayed something like this: "Thank you for this food, thank you for my Missy wife, AMEN! Okay, let's eat!" (Can you tell that T is usually the one who asks the blessing at dinner?)

Hair, Hair, Everywhere

The shedding, it has commenced.

Cloth Diapering

Stephanie asked about cloth diapering, so I'll give a quick overview of what we do. We use diaper-service-quality Chinese prefolds (currently newborn size for Cupcake and regular size for D.L.F., but soon we will be putting D.L.F. into toddler size when Cupcake needs the regular size) with Snappi diaper fasteners (you can get them on Ebay pretty inexpensively). We use hemp doublers inside the diapers.

Over that we use Aristocrats wool soakers. We have two for each of the kids. It would be better to have more, but they are expensive, so we make do with what we have (we do have some cheap back-up plastic covers, but I don't like using them because they leak). Because we only have two soakers each, we wash them pretty frequently with a soap containing lanolin (lanolin helps make the wool more waterproof). I occasionally lanolize the soakers (we call them "woolies") with lanolin balm.

My favorite cloth diaper resource is Diaper Pin. It has articles, product reviews, a sale page where retailers can list their current promotions, and more. Here is a cloth diaper "how-to." Also, Candy has written some posts about cloth diapering, which you can read here and here.

Whew...that's a lot of links. Okay, any more questions?

Really Busy!

We've been super-busy lately...with having family members over to our house, attending weddings, running errands, and the like.

I've gotten into the habit of walking 2 miles every morning before T goes to work. I actually really enjoy it and look forward to that time (well, except for the getting up at 5 AM part...but at least Cupcake sleeps through the night, so it's really not so bad). I've been listening to audio sermons and messages on my MP3 player that I download from Oneplace.com. Lately I've mostly been listening to Revive Our Hearts, with Nancy Leigh DeMoss.

I've also been in an organizing mood lately. Today I worked on our bedroom closet and a small table in our bedroom that was piled high with baby clothes and accessories.

There are often Christian books I hear about that I want to read, but they aren't available from my public library. I just recently figured out that I can use the interlibrary loan service my library offers that allows me to get (for free!) almost any book in almost any library in America. What a blessing, as I certainly couldn't afford to purchase all those books! I visited the library by myself tonight (a rare occurrence!) and put a whole bunch of Christian books by Carolyn Mahaney, Nancy Leigh DeMoss, Anne Ortlund, and others on hold through the interlibrary loan service.

Homemade Natural Deodorant

I like it! I finally tried it because I kept having to switch brands and scents of deodorants because of skin irritation. Also, I was concerned about the health effects of the aluminum that is in most antiperspirants (aluminum has been linked to cancer, Alzheimer's disease, etc.).

This all-natural stuff feels great and it honestly works better (read: I don't stink) than any store-bought deodorant I've ever used. I think it is important to use a good-quality unrefined coconut oil, because of its antibacterial properties.

Here's the recipe at Tammy's Recipes (which is a really great blog/recipe site; many of Tammy's recipes have become standbys at our house!).

Update: Okay, now that I've been using this stuff for a while, I have to say that sometimes if I apply it right after shaving, my underarms get irritated. I still like it, and I really like the light coconut scent, but I think next time I make it, I will use less baking soda.

Cupcake is 2 Months Old!

I had my last appointment with my midwives yesterday. Cupcake weighs 13 pounds now, and my midwives all said she seems very mature for 9 weeks. Midwife L. said Cupcake is allergic to something I'm eating (indicated by scaliness behind Cupcake's ears), so L. recommended I stop eating peanut products, which are the most common culprit. She said if eliminating peanut products doesn't help, then the next thing to go will have to be dairy. Hopefully it won't come to that....

I am going to start walking a few evenings a week. There is a 2-mile fitness trail near our house, and last night I walked it twice (4 miles!) in 70 minutes. I have a couple of albums specifically intended for exercising. The songs have strong beats, and each song flows seamlessly into the next. The beats per minute gradually increase and hold at a pretty fast rate for quite a while, and then slow again. Today I'm feeling the burn!

Family in Town

T's parents are here from out-of-state and spent the weekend with us. I only wish we'd had more time together, but we'll get to see them a little more next weekend.

Lately, whenever D.L.F. wants something, he phrases his request in the form of a question, and then answers himself with an enthusiastic, "Okay!"

"Do you want some raisins? Okay!"

"Do you need some help? Okay!"

"Do you want to get the mail? Okay!"

Cradle Song

 

What does little birdie say
In her nest at peep of day?
Let me fly, says little birdie,
Mother, let me fly away.
Birdie, rest a little longer,
Till thy little wings are stronger.
So she rests a little longer,
Then she flies away.

What does little baby say,
In her bed at peep of day?
Baby says, like little birdie,
Let me rise and fly away.
Baby, sleep a little longer,
Till thy little limbs are stronger.
If she sleeps a little longer,
Baby too shall fly away.

-Alfred, Lord Tennyson

Summer Haircut

We finally broke down and took D.L.F. in for a real haircut (as opposed to my clueless and haphazard scissor-lopping).

Before

 

After

 

 

11 PM and Finally Cooling Off

We attended a lovely outdoor wedding today. D.L.F. and Cupcake did pretty well, although D.L.F. started to get cranky toward the end for lack of a nap (plus the heat--it was 100 degrees today with 50% humidity--and neither our car nor our home has air conditioning!). Also, since we moved into our home over a year ago, we had been storing a queen-size bed in D.L.F.'s room. He played on it, it was where we changed his diaper, it was where we sat and sang songs and read books before nap and bed times. Some friends of ours are getting married soon and needed a bed for their new home together, so we were happy to give the bed to them, but it was kind of traumatic for my little buddy. His room looks so empty now! Change is so hard on kids, but they are also resilient, so I know D.L.F. will get used to his room's new look soon. We were able to move some of his larger toys out of the living room and into his bedroom, since there is more room in there now.

I've been expressing to T a lot lately that I need to get serious about losing the weight that I put on when I was pregnant with Cupcake. T tells me he likes the way I look, but he also understands that losing weight is something I want to do--not just to look better, but also for my health and comfort (I've been having back problems). So tonight he showed his support by surprising me with an MP3 player that I can use while exercising, and he said that he wants to help me do what it takes. He and I still need to talk about options, but I'll probably be joining a gym and/or getting some exercise equipment soon. Oh, and, uh, cutting back on the chocolate. That will actually be extremely difficult for me, because I really like chocolate and eat it pretty much every day and get headaches if I don't. Anyway, I love my hubby and appreciate his thoughtfulness and support so much.

My favorite use of tax dollars

I walked to the library this morning with the kids (hooray for the Ergo! It's so much easier to deal with than the double stroller, and Cupcake likes it much better). We signed up for the summer reading program. I did it last year with D.L.F., and it was a lot of fun. For every 15 minutes (or whatever parents decide for their own children) of reading, you mark one space on the path of the child's game board (like Candy Land). There are several check-in points, where you take the gameboard back to the library and pick out a prize. When all the spaces are filled, the child gets to choose either a T-shirt or a gift certificate to a book store. I remember doing summer reading programs when I was a kid, and they were fun, but all we ever got were stickers to cover the spaces on the game board. I was always jealous of my friends who lived within city limits and got to participate in the city's summer reading program that had actual prizes. :-) I'm over it now.

Anyhow, we also unintentionally showed up just in time for storytime. We had never attended storytime before at this library, and D.L.F. had a great time. The librarian read books, sang songs, did fingerplays, blew bubbles, and handed out shakers for the kids to dance around with. The funniest part to me was when all the kids joined hands and walked around in a circle and sang "Ring Around the Rosie." D.L.F. sort of just stood there and allowed himself to be pulled along, but he didn't get that he was supposed to pick up his feet and go around in a circle. It was cute. :-) Cupcake seemed to enjoy watching all the big kids (it was a multi-age storytime for kids 0-6) . Pretty soon she'll be right in there with them!

Eggs are a few of his favorite things

Last night T asked D.L.F., "What did you have for breakfast?"

D.L.F.: "Eggs!"

T: "What did you have for lunch?"

D.L.F.: "Eggs!"

T: "What did you have for dinner?"

D.L.F.: "Eggs!"

T: "What did you have for dessert?"

D.L.F.: "Lasagna!"

He did have eggs for lunch, but his other answers were made up. :-)

Contemplating Her Navel

We're back from a whirlwind trip to visit my parents and grandma for Father's Day. D.L.F. and Cupcake were pretty good travelers. We took Cupcake in to my midwife today to have her belly button looked at. She had this weird bubble-like thing, about a quarter-inch in diameter, growing inside her belly button. My midwife said it was a little piece of leftover artery from the umbilical cord and just snipped it off. Also, Cupcake has an umbilical hernia, which basically just means that her belly button bulges out. According to my midwife, it will resolve itself when she starts walking, and she'll probably end up with an "outie" belly button.

Melt My Heart, Why Dontcha?

This afternoon after I had put D.L.F. in his crib and told him I loved him, he said (for the first time), "I yuv you, Mama." AWWWWWW! That made my day!

I haven't blogged lately because, although I have two laptops, they both only work on their terms, not mine. The "good" laptop has been overheating lately and shutting itself down, and only T knows how to fix it (it involves taking off the keyboard with a butter knife and carefully resetting something inside the laptop...if you don't do it right, you risk permanently ruining the...something...I don't remember...but anyway, I let T do it because I'm too chicken and don't want to be responsible for killing a perfectly good--okay, not perfectly good--laptop). So the laptop I'm using right now is a behemoth that has keyboard issues. The shift key only works about one time in ten, and letters often repeat like ttthhiiiiiiiiss. So I don't enjoy typing on this laptop. I'll blog more when my other laptop gets fixed.

Pants Dance

Here is a song (made up by T) that we often sing to D.L.F. as we are getting him dressed. It is sung to the tune of that song that people always sing, "Can, can, can you do the Can Can?" (What is the name of that song, anyway? I played it for a piano recital once--and no, I am not good at piano).

Pants dance
Can you do the pants dance
In your little [insert D.L.F.'s pants color here] pants
Can you do the dance
Dance dance dance dance dance dance dance

[Repeat]

I Like This Papa Guy

 

Cheese

 

 

 

 

The Dress Code, According to D.L.F.

D.L.F. came into the bathroom just as I was stepping out of the shower. He took one look at me and said, "Mama needs socks!"

Well, that's an understatement, I thought.

Cupcake is 1 Month Old!

She had a check-up today and is 10 pounds, 6 oz. She has gained two pounds in the last two weeks! My arms can tell it when I carry her. And her cheeks are getting so cute and chubby. She is a great sleeper. I don't know if that's thanks to the advice in Babywise or if it's just her temperament, but either way, I'm not complaining! :-) She is so mellow and sweet, and is just learning how to smile. Her first month went by so fast! Before I know it, she'll be a year old. Hard to believe....

Time for a Trim

This morning D.L.F. was watching me use kitchen scissors to snip small pieces off strips of bacon. He said, "Bacon...haircut!"

Precious Girl

 

Here are Cupcake and I right before we went out the door last night to a tea party/baby dedication in her honor. :-)

I was so blessed and encouraged by the support of the women who came, most of whom are part of our house church. I'm glad Cupcake in growing up in a community with godly women to be examples for her.

4 Things Meme

Oops...I just realized that my friend Lani tagged me almost a month ago to do this meme. Sorry I'm just getting around to it now, Lani!

4 jobs i've had:
1. occasional babysitter
2. sheet music organizer at a band teachers' workshop
3. full-time nanny
4. college cafeteria cashier


4 movies i've watched more than once:
1. The Sound of Music
2. Pride and Prejudice (BBC version)
3. The Man from Snowy River
4. a video of myself reading books and singing songs to D.L.F....he requests it almost every day (it's getting old!)


4 places i've lived:

1. a house
2. another house
3. a dorm
4. an apartment

(What, I'm supposed to be more specific than that?)


4 TV shows i watch:

We don't have a T.V., but if we did, I would watch:

1. The Waltons
2. Little House on the Prairie
3. What Not to Wear (I've seen it several times at my parents', and it's addicting)
4. I heard about a reality show where a family has to go build their own home in the wilderness and "rough it"...I don't remember the name, but it sounded interesting.

4 places i've been:

1. Germany (on tour with the Continental Singers)
2. Ohio (a year of college)
3. Alaska (choir tour)
4. Hawaii (a couple times as a kid and then with T for our honeymoon)

4 people who email me regularly:

Eh...I dunno. A handful of people, including T and my mom, E-mail me occasionally, but I wouldn't say "regularly." I pass on this question.

4 of my favorite foods:

1. omelets
2. dark chocolate
3. cheddar cheese
4. natural crunchy peanut butter

4 places i would love to visit:

1. The United Kingdom
2. Hawaii (again)
3. T's parents who live in a different state
4. a family-owned farm to observe their daily operations


4 things i'm looking forward to in the coming year:

1. hanging out with T's parents when they visit us this summer
2. watching my kids as they learn and grow
3. losing some (okay, a lot) of baby weight
4. seeing what God will do in and through the house church we are a part of


4 friends i'm tagging:

Hmm...I'll cheat and make it simple. If you're reading this and you would like to do this meme in the comments here or on your own blog, consider yourself tagged!

WANTED For Being Too Cute!

 

 

A lady from the church I grew up in recently gave us several outfits for D.L.F. and Cupcake. This is one of D.L.F.'s...the shirt has a cowboy on it and reads, "WANTED for being too cute!"

Too Busy

I have been too busy to blog. Everything is going well around here, though. Cupcake was up to 8 lbs., 7 oz. at her 2-week checkup, so she has regained her birth weight and then some. Dear Little Fellow is doing really well now with having a little sister. He is getting better at entertaining himself while I take care of Cupcake. She still sleeps a lot, but my midwives say that's fine--since she's gaining plenty of weight--and that I should enjoy it while it lasts!

Some friends of ours (who just got engaged--yay!) brought dinner over to share with us last night, and we had such a nice time together.

I took both kids out by myself for the first time on Monday. Wow! It took so much preparation...getting myself ready, getting D.L.F. and Cupcake dressed, nursing Cupcake, figuring out the double stroller, packing everything required for a trip out with a baby and toddler, and then hauling everything down a flight of stairs! Oh, and Cupcake spit up all over me right before we were ready to go out the door! I figured, since we were only going to the park, no one would really get that close to me, so I just wiped it off as well as I could, and we were on our way. Five years ago, the thought of doing that probably would have disgusted me to no end, but...things change when you become a mom. :-) It's been too rainy the past couple of days to go anywhere, but if the weather clears up today, I would like try to take the kids to the library. We'll see.

One of Life's Little Mysteries

How is it that, by adding one child to our family, our dirty laundry has quadrupled?

The First Week

I am not as utterly, totally exhausted after Cupcake’s quick birth than I was after my long, very difficult labor with D.L.F. Aside from the normal discomforts of the early days of nursing, I physically feel pretty good. Cupcake is proving to be a good nurser, but she is quite the sleepyhead. I sometimes have to tickle her or pat a cool, damp washcloth on her face to get her to wake up enough to nurse. I am working really hard to get her to nurse eight times a day, which is the minimum number of times recommended. She seems to be getting plenty of milk, though, based on her, uh, diaper output. I am starting to get Cupcake on a routine (more about that later), which is helpful for her and the whole family. In general, she is so far a pretty “easy” baby and not very fussy.

D.L.F. is adjusting to being a big brother. I try to spend lots of time with him while Cupcake is sleeping. It is obvious that he is craving attention from T and me. He loves for me to rock him in the rocking chair and sing to him (he often requests particular songs and helps with the words!). Today he went grocery shopping with T in the morning, and this afternoon, he and T went to church, which met tonight at the home of a family who has a trampoline in their backyard. D.L.F. was excited to hear that he would get to bounce on the trampoline.

Now, about the “routine” we are working on for Cupcake: in the first days of D.L.F.’s life, I refused to even read Babywise, by Gary Ezzo and Robert Bucknam. I had heard of the controversy surrounding the book and the Ezzo’s ministry, and I had read so many “attachment parenting” books that I was quite biased against the concept of putting a young baby on a routine. But then I read about how Jess and Gretchen had successfully implemented Babywise with their children, and I decided it couldn’t hurt to read the book and see if I could glean at least a scrap of useful information from it.

I was surprised to find that the advice in Babywise is very practical, and not cruel or extreme as some reviewers on the internet would make it out to be. The most helpful thing I learned from the book was to make sure that baby is really getting a full feeding, and not just "snacking" here and there. Gretchen does a great job of explaining the basic tenets of the Babywise philosophy, so I will not repeat what she has written, but will direct you to her article here. (Also, it seems that at least some of the negative things said about the Ezzos and Babywise have been proven false. See this web site.)

We have started applying the Babywise concepts with Cupcake, and I am hopeful that they will help her become a content, well-rested, happy baby who understands that we love her dearly and will meet her needs.

Cupcake with Her Papa

 

A Man in the Kitchen

 

Hubby, whom I have decided to refer to as "T" on this blog because I feel goofy always calling him "Hubby," came up with a creative solution to a problem the other night. My parents were over, and Mom had made some shortcakes and sugared some strawberries, and all that was left to do was whip up some whipping cream. She didn't know when she bought all the ingredients for strawberry shortcake that I had burned up the motor in my electric mixer a while back trying to mix a batch of peanut butter cookie dough. Mom and T took turns trying to whip the cream by hand with a whisk, but after several minutes of doing that with no apparent progress, T went and got his electric drill, inserted a whisk, and voila! Whipped cream in moments! (By the way, T bought me a new mixer, as well as three different kinds of dark chocolate, for Mother's Day!)

3 Days Old

My Cupcake

 

I Have Two Children Now!

 

Cupcake with Her Grandma (My Mom)

 

The Birth of Our Daughter

 

Here is the birth story of our daughter, who will henceforth be referred to on this blog as "Cupcake," because she's cute, little, and sweet. :-)

I woke up at 12:30 A.M. having some moderate contractions. They weren’t extremely painful, but I thought they seemed stronger than Braxton-Hicks. After a while, I started timing them, and they were about ten minutes apart. I lay awake for several hours and then managed to doze a bit between the contractions, which had slowed down.

I continued to have light to moderate contractions throughout the morning and early afternoon. I wasn’t very diligent to time them, because they weren’t even requiring my full concentration at that point—I was able to continue doing whatever I was doing through them.

I managed to take a nap for a couple of hours in the afternoon, which I guess meant that I didn’t have contractions during that time, or they were so light they were unnoticeable.

After I woke up, I decided to take a walk to see if that would help the contractions become more intense. I walked briskly around the neighborhood for about twenty or twenty-five minutes and had four fairly strong contractions during that time. When I got home, I started to make dinner. I had all the ingredients for potato-broccoli-bacon soup, and I wanted to use them up before they spoiled, so I started making the soup, even though the temperature was in the seventies and I already felt hot. I started chopping up vegetables and realized that my contractions were getting closer together and stronger. My water broke at with a gush at 5:00 P.M. while I was standing at the kitchen sink peeling potatoes. I found a contraction timer on the internet and started using that every time I had a contraction. Within forty-five minutes or so, the contractions went from moderate intensity and about five minutes apart to extremely strong and about three-and-a-half minutes apart. My water gushed a couple more times during contractions. By this time, Hubby had called my mom, who was staying nearby, and she said she would be right over. I guess I should have realized how close I was to having a baby at that point, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up of having a short labor, so I continued trying to make the soup. I told myself all these contractions were probably a false alarm, and the baby probably wouldn’t actually come for a couple more days. Finally, Hubby told me to stop making soup and come pack my bag! He had already put in a lot of my things for me, but I tossed in a few more things between contractions, which had me yelling and pounding on the wall. My mom arrived and took charge of D.L.F., who was becoming a little upset about seeing Mama acting so strangely (at first, he thought it was just a game and tried to imitate the sounds I was making, but after a while, he realized I wasn’t playing around). As we were heading out the door, I was giving my mom instructions on how to finish the soup! She said she would figure it out just fine, and I should go get in the car.

We made it down the stairs and about halfway out to the car when a big contraction hit. I was a bit embarrassed to have to moan so loudly while there were other people in the parking lot of our apartment complex, but I couldn’t help it.

We left our house around 6:30 P.M. and got to the birth center at 6:50. During the ride, I sat in the backseat and clenched the handle grip above the door with all my might during contractions, which were getting closer and closer together. The breeze from the open windows felt great. My method of distracting myself during contractions at this time was to slowly sing the ABC song in my head and mentally write the letters in swirly cursive.

When we arrived, Hubby opened my car door for me and extended his hand to help me out, but I was in the middle of having a contraction, so he stood there waiting until the contraction finished. Then I got out of the car and had another contraction. There were three men talking together on the sidewalk at the bottom of the stairway up to the birth center. I tried to ignore them, but was again embarrassed to be making such animalistic noises. We made it up the stairs and into the birth center. I saw my midwives, but couldn’t bring myself to even greet them, as the contractions were right on top of each other and were all I could concentrate on. I requested the room D.L.F. was born in. I collapsed on my side on the bed, and Midwife L. did a quick exam and said I was at ten centimeters and ready to push. Wow! What a different experience from the hours and hours and hours we spent at the birth center awaiting the birth of D.L.F.

Someone asked if I wanted the tub filled. I said sure, but I was beyond caring where the baby would be born. I was just ready to get her out. While the tub was being filled, I sat on a horseshoe-shaped wooden birth stool, gripped the handles, and pushed. Hubby was right behind me rubbing my back the whole time. I didn’t need the back massage this time in the same way I needed it with D.L.F., who was posterior, but it was still nice to feel Hubby’s touch and know he was there supporting me. He kept telling me what a great job I was doing and reminding me that we would see our baby very soon.

I started pushing at 7:07. At first, I was yelling a low “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” every time I pushed, but Midwife L. suggested changing to a more grunty yell, which would help get the baby out more easily. And it did—Cupcake was born at 7:27 P.M., weighing 8 pounds, 1 ounce, and measuring 20 ¼ inches long. It was only thirty-seven minutes from the time we walked in the door of the birth center until she was in my arms. Whew! Her APGAR scores were 9 and 10.

I bled quite a bit, approximately 450 milliliters, and so one of the midwives gave me a shot of pitocin in my right thigh to help control the bleeding.

I pushed the placenta out at 7:36. It was large, healthy-looking, and complete. Cupcake’s cord was extremely long—“Enough cord for two babies,” as one of the midwives put it. Hubby cut the cord at 7:41. I got into the tub and cleaned up a bit.

I started nursing Cupcake at 8:00. She was more interested in trying to get her fingers in her mouth than in nursing, but she did manage to latch on and suck for about forty-five minutes.

Midwife D. brought us take-out from a Thai restaurant. I had cashew chicken, and Hubby had teriyaki chicken. We were hungry, as we never had gotten to eat our soup! Hubby fed my dinner to me, as my hands were busy with Cupcake.

After we ate, Midwife L. examined me and found that I had a small first-degree tear which did not require stitches. I was so grateful for that, as getting my third-degree tear after D.L.F.’s birth stitched up was physically and emotionally as hard or harder on me than the actual birth.

We left the birth center at 10:50 P.M.—exactly four hours after our arrival. Midwife D. said, “What a great way to spend an evening. It only took the same amount of time as going out for dinner and a movie, but you got a baby!”

Hubby and I thank God for our precious, sweet baby daughter. It was a blessing to have such a quick, natural, peaceful, beautiful, relatively easy birth. Mama and Baby are both doing great.

 

 

 

More Weekend Fun

My mom and I took D.L.F. to the zoo this morning. It was his first time to go, and he enjoyed it. I think his favorite exhibit was the sea otters. He kept calling them doggies....they did kind of look that way. We also saw elephants, tigers, bears, and various types of monkeys, birds, and sea life.

My parents are coming back later tonight and bringing Thai food from our favorite local joint. I asked them to make mine mild, but now that I think about it, maybe I should have said to get hot, as I've heard spicy foods can help a woman go into labor! Still no progress in that department....

Hubby and my dad stayed at our house and worked on organizing and clearing excess "stuff" out of our "stuff room"--basically, a room that up until this point, has been used exclusively for storage, but we now want to use it for the baby's room. They made some good progress.

Family Weekend

My parents are in town. Mom and I took D.L.F. to the park this morning to see the ducks, and now Mom and Dad are on their way over and should be here in a few minutes. It surely would be handy if I would just go into labor tonight or tomorrow, since my parents are already here!

A May Baby

Well, considering that today is the last day of April, and I still have no signs of going into labor, it looks like we will be getting a May baby. Now at least I can stitch the month of Baby Girl's birth onto the sampler I am making for her room. At least, she'd better not stay in me until June! :-)

A Fun and Busy Day

Until Baby Girl decides to make an appearance, I am trying to keep busy and do some fun things so I don't feel like I'm just sitting around waiting. Today D.L.F. and I took Hubby to work so that we could have the car. We went to a children's museum. D.L.F. had a blast, but he played so hard there that he was exhausted and kind of cranky for the rest of the day, even though he took a good nap when we got home. Later, when it was time to pick Hubby up from work, we toured his office and said hi to all his co-workers, and then picked up a take-and-bake pizza on the way home.

I am so weary tonight. I wonder why (perhaps carrying around a full-term baby has something to do with it?). :-) I am just going to take it easy for a while and probably go to bed early. I am reading a book called Deafening, by Frances Itani. It is very good so far.

Not that I really have any choice in the matter (I was just reading the other day that a hormone is secreted by the baby's brain when he or she is ready to be born), but I was thinking that May Day (May 1) would be a nice birthday for Baby Girl. I have fond childhood memories of making May Day baskets and dropping them off anonymously on my friends' doorsteps. Maybe I will continue that tradition with my children when they are a bit older.

No Baby Yet

But here are two random thoughts:

1) The tree outside my bedroom window burst into full bloom today. I have no idea what kind of tree it is, but it is pretty. It has white flowers now that look almost like cherry blossoms, but in the winter it had red berries.

2) What is it with the word verification letters you have to type when you want to comment on someone's Blogger blog? Is it just me, or are they getting even harder to read? Sometimes it takes me half-a-dozen tries to get it right!

Come Back, Contractions!

The contractions I was having stopped as soon as I laid down in bed (that doesn't look right...I never did figure out all those rules about "lay" vs. "lie"). As soon as I lay down in bed? Anyone? How am I ever going to homeschool my children? :-)

Anyhow, I'm doing lots of laundry today, so Baby, you can come out now.

Yay! Pain!

I am currently having some contractions that are stronger than any I have experienced so far this pregnancy. They don't hurt too badly, but I wouldn't call them "painless." I'm not getting excited yet, though. I'm going to bed. I'll post again if I determine that I'm really in labor.... I kinda doubt I am. Besides, I need to do laundry before I can have a baby. :-)

Gotta Get 'Em Clean Somehow

D.L.F. had been wearing navy blue socks that had left lint all over his feet. I wiped the lint off with a damp cloth and let him run around while I searched for another pair of socks. By the time I was ready to put the new socks on, the soles of his feet were dirty again (guess it's time to vacuum?). I told him, "Your feet are dirty." He thought about it for a moment, and then said, "Dustbuster!" "You want me to use the dustbuster on your feet?" I asked. "Yeah!" he replied enthusiastically.

39 Weeks Pregnant--Almost There!

 

I had an appointment today with my midwives. Everything is perfectly normal--baby's heart rate, my blood pressure, baby's position (still L.O.A.). I have Braxton-Hicks contractions occasionally, but nothing painful or regular yet. Every night when I go to bed, I wonder, Will tonight be the night contractions start? Obviously, contractions could start during the day, too, but I always think of them as starting at night (maybe because that's how it happened with D.L.F.).

I think we have everything we need for the birth, which isn't a lot. If we were having a home birth, we would be responsible to purchase a lot of birth supplies ourselves, but since we are going to a birth center, they have pretty much everything on hand there, and the supplies are just included in the regular fee. We did get eight bottles of Recharge (an all-natural sports drink...like Gatorade, but healthier), so that should help keep me (and Hubby) hydrated. I think I drank about five bottles by myself last time I was in labor! I am preparing a gift basket with snacks inside for each of our three midwives to give them when we get to the birth center...after all, they will be working hard (and round-the-clock) and need nourishment, too! We have a special very pink and girly "first outfit" to bring Baby Girl home in, although I think I will pack a boy outfit, too, just in case! You never know; ultrasounds are not 100% reliable.

We decided our bedroom is too crowded to fit Baby's crib (we will put the crib in our "office"--office being in quotes because it's more of a junk room at present--for her naps), so we're hoping to purchase a small bassinet off Craigslist before Baby comes. Haven't found a good one yet, but we'll keep looking. We have all the diapering things we will need, and people have been very kind in giving us lots of girl clothes, so that's pretty much it!

Cracks me up every time

This video will make your day. Who can resist laughing at such a cute baby?

A Trip to the Park

 

As long as he doesn't go around saying it in public

This morning, Hubby was making up silly words to the melody of the children's nursery rhyme, "Hot Cross Buns." The thing is, he didn't even realize that that was the melody he was using...but D.L.F. did! D.L.F. started saying, "Hot buns! Hot buns! Hot buns!"

"Did he just say what I think he said?" Hubby called to me.

"Yes," I replied. "You were singing the melody to 'Hot Cross Buns.'"

What made it even more hilarious was that while this took place, D.L.F. was playing in the bathroom, and Hubby had just stepped out of the shower and was drying off. He thought D.L.F. was commenting on his physique!

Thank You!

Just wanted to take a moment to say THANK YOU! to all who leave comments on my blog. I'm not usually great about responding to comments in the comment section, but please know that I do read and appreciate each one!

On Waiting

I remembered as I was trying to get comfortable in bed last night that, at this time in my pregnancy with D.L.F., the weather was in the 90's and 100's (it was late August). At least being sticky-sweaty-hot is not something I have had to deal with this time around! The weather has been typical spring weather around here...cloudy, rainy, warm and sunny, hailing, and today I think I even saw a bit of snow mixed in with the rain. I am happy about having a late-spring baby this time, just at the time when flowers begin blooming in earnest and the weather starts warming up. I'm planning to take it easy and rest for the first few weeks after Baby Girl is born, but after that, I'm looking forward to taking D.L.F. and Baby Girl out in our new-to-us double stroller and walking off some of this baby weight!

I keep saying I'm soooo ready to be done with this pregnancy, but this evening I read some words in a book called The Naturally Healthy Pregnancy, by Shonda Parker, that were encouraging and convicting:

"Mental, or emotional, preparation coincides with spiritual preparation. We cannot be emotionally at peace if our focus is not on trusting our Divine Creator in His wisdom and plan for this child, this pregnancy, this birth. We delight in our husband's washing us with the Word of God, allowing the Scriptures to bring us peace, comfort, and BOLDNESS in the approaching birth. Joy is found in trusting the Lord, sacrificial trusting that surrenders our own plans, even our own hopes, to the Will of God.

"As the time of our birth draws near, may our spirits be cleansed and renewed in our trust in the grace of the Lord, may our hearts be gladdened with the assurance of His mercy, may our bodies open in the fullness of time under His pillar of strength, may our hearts be turned to our babies in the perfection of His love." [emphasis is the author's]

And so I wait. It's hard not knowing exactly when I will go into labor, how long it will take, how hard it will be, or at what moment Baby Girl will take her first breath, but the Lord knows all those details and has a plan and purpose for the way things will unfold.

Question: Teaching a Foreign Language to Young Children

Hubby and I are thinking of learning Spanish. We live in an area where the population is probably at least 60% Hispanic, and one of the main reasons we and other members of our home church moved into this neighborhood was to be able to reach out to our neighbors. We are finding out that that is difficult to do when we don't know their language. I have a good Spanish program (textbook, audio and video CD-ROMs, workbook, etc.) from taking a quarter of Spanish way-back-when at community college, so Hubby and I can probably use that as a starting point.

My questions are, what if we start practicing at home in front of our toddler? Do kids get confused if they sometimes hear an object called one name in one language and another name in another language? Has anyone ever had experience with your children learning two different languages at once? Did it frustrate them and delay their language skills, or did it enhance their language abilities?

Miscellaneous

D.L.F. has been going around lately saying, "Hi, Buddy," "Hi, Honey," and "Hi, Cutie." Obviously, he picked up those phrases from me. I'm not sure if he is simply repeating them or if he is using them as names for me. Either way, it's pretty cute.

We live a few blocks away from a plant nursery, so sometimes we walk over there when we need an outing but I don't want to go too far. We went there today. D.L.F. likes to look at flowers and the fish in the pond. He is learning the names of some colors, so I point out the colors of all the flowers we see. It's cheap entertainment. :-)

I had a prenatal appointment yesterday. Baby is now in L.O.A. position, which I guess is the "ideal" position for birth, so I hope she stays that way! I mentioned that my lower back was achy, and the supervising midwife rubbed it with arnica oil for me about half an hour! It felt so good and made me extra-happy to be back with my midwives again instead of an OB/GYN.

I am reading a fairly new book called The Big Book of Birth, by Erica Lyon (I was able to get it through my local library). I'm not done yet, but I recommend it. Most books about pregnancy are 90% about getting through your three trimesters, and oh, here's a chapter about birth at the end. But as the title suggests, this entire book is about birth. It includes lots of information on non-chemical pain coping techniques, and there are women's personal stories interspersed throughout regarding every stage of labor. It's still a fairly basic book (it's not a midwifery manual or anything), but it's nice to have a concise guide to what labor can be like (I think it would be especially good for a first-time mom who wants to have some idea of what to expect).

Two Pregnancy Haikus (Updated)

1. It’s sandal season
Painting toenails--no small feat
With a large belly

2. Evening spent shopping
Results in swollen ankles
At least toes impress

Almost 38 Weeks and READY TO BE DONE!

I had a routine appointment with my midwives on Monday. Everything looks good! I was measuring right at 37 centimeters. On that day, Baby was in ROT position (right occiput transverse, which means head-down and facing my left side). I hope she will stay in a good position for birth so I won't have back labor this time around.

(Gripe warning!) I am so ready for her to come out. I am uncomfortable all the time, it's hard to find a comfortable position to sleep in, and when I finally do get to sleep, I wake up every hour or two to use the bathroom. Plus, my maternity shirts are all too small for me now, so anytime I go anywhere, I have to keep tugging them down to keep my tummy covered. I get fatigued really easily, especially when bending down to do something like pick up toys off the floor or unload the dishwasher. A huge blessing is that people in our church have brought us dinners every night this week, so that has been one less thing to think about.

Hurrah for Midwives

My parents are in town for a couple days, so Mom and Dear Little Fellow and I went shopping today to get a few more things for Baby. I got a call from my midwives saying they are happy to take me back as a client (YAY!). I am so thankful to the Lord, and I'm looking forward to a birth center birth (not so much to the actual pain of labor, but to the restful environment of the birth center and the support and encouragement of my midwives).

Almost Ready for Baby

We got a double stroller, a crib, and a crib mattress off Craigslist tonight. I'm starting to feel like it's really going to happen...that is, that we are going to have a daughter soon!

Wow!

At my ultrasound appointment today, we found out that the placenta is now approximately three centimeters from my cervix! The doctor said he thinks I should be able to deliver vaginally at the birth center with my midwives, and he is going to write them a letter saying so. I am rejoicing! Please pray with me that the midwives will accept me back as a client.

My Appointment, Part 2

Read Part 1 here.

As a preface to Part 2 of my rant against institutionalized maternity care, I would like to say that I do trust that the Lord is in this situation and that He loves me and my family and will take care of us all, no matter what. However, I also believe it is my responsibility to learn all I can about my options so I can make the best choice for my baby and me. I am sorry if my uncharacteristically cynical tone bothers anybody, but it is helpful to me in processing all this to be very honest with myself and others about my struggles and disappointments. Maybe writing things down will help me figure out a workable solution.

After meeting with the doctor, I asked the receptionist if it would be possible to tour the labor and delivery area. We had seen it very briefly the last time we were at the hospital, but as I had been riding in a wheelchair (it’s a big hospital to get around, and I was still on bedrest), I hadn’t really been able to poke around and see everything I wanted to—in particular, the rumored whirlpool tubs in the bathrooms.

The receptionist called over to let the staff know we were on our way, and Hubby and I made the long trek over to the maternity ward. The nurse who showed us around was actually pleasant and kind, but it was obvious she still had to bow to procedures and policies. For example, when I asked her if it was all right to labor and give birth in any position I wanted to, she hesitated and said, “Well…you’ll really have to talk to your doctor about that.” She seemed excited to show off all their new high-tech monitoring equipment. “There’s a computer right here in your room, so your nurse will be able to see how you and baby are doing at all times. Plus, of course, your information will be displayed on the screens in the nurses’ station as well.” Great, so they can monitor and analyze every blip and bleep and tell me that my baby is “in distress” if her heart rate decelerates during a contraction.

The nurse also seemed proud of the “warming unit” for the baby right in the room. Yeah, right, I thought. As if that plastic box could do a better job keeping my baby warm than I could, with her on my chest and covered with blankets.

We peeked in the bathroom and saw that the whirlpool tub looks half decent. It’s not as big as the tubs at the birth center, but it is deeper than a normal tub. I asked if it was permitted to give birth in the water. “Oh, no,” the nurse said. “If everything is going normally, you can labor in the tub, but you have to get out toward the end.” Why? I thought. It was so nice to be in the water when I was on my hands and knees pushing out D.L.F., and I can’t imagine not having the option, at least. If midwives can kneel beside the tub and catch the baby from behind, why can’t a doctor?

The only real bed in the room is an insanely uncomfortable twin bed with rails on both sides and a crack in the middle so the head can be raised or lowered. Oh, yes, and fold-out stirrups at the foot. When Hubby and I got out to the parking lot, I told him, “There is no way I will be on my back for one second during labor, and if they think I’m going to stick my feet in stirrups for the doctor’s convenience, they’d better think again.”

I hate being treated like a high-risk patient when I don’t feel like one. I still trust my body to birth naturally. If I had to give birth in a hospital, I would feel like I constantly have to be on top of things to the point where I wouldn’t be able to relax or get halfway comfortable (No, I don’t want anything for the pain.... Okay, that’s enough monitoring. Baby and I are fine. I’m taking off these straps now…. No, I don’t want you to check my cervix again.... No, I am not going to sit up in bed to push…. DO NOT put my baby in that warmer…. DO NOT give my baby a hepatitis B shot or eye ointment….on and on and on.) In addition, I just don’t feel like doctors are as committed to the well-being of the women in the care as midwives. For example, in my readings about C-sections lately, I came across a statistic showing that teaching hospitals, which have obstetricians and anesthesiologists on duty 24/7, have a lower C-section rate than regular community hospitals with doctors typically on-duty during daylight hours, indicating that if a woman’s labor is progressing too slowly, a doctor in a regular hospital just might be quicker to tell her she needs a C-section, so he can get home.

I’ve already called my midwives to ask how far away my placenta would have to get from my cervix for them to take me back on as a client. The supervising midwife is out of town right now, but she’s supposed to get back to me by the beginning of next week. I have another ultrasound tomorrow, so I’ll find out the status of the placenta then.

My Appointment, Part 1

I don’t think I can give birth in a hospital. After meeting with the OB/GYN again yesterday, touring the labor and delivery area, and asking lots of questions, I was disappointed, discouraged, and even angry. A prenatal appointment at the hospital is so hurried, impersonal, and intimidating compared to a visit with my midwives.

When I went to the desk to check in, the receptionist was on the phone. Finally, she hung up, looked at me without a smile, and waited for me to say something. I told her my name, and she handed me a label. I must have looked puzzled, because she said, “For the bathroom.” I was still confused. “I’ve only been here once before….” I said. Then she explained that every time I come for an appointment, I am supposed to get a label, go to the bathroom, and leave a urine sample with the label affixed to it. So I did, but it bothered me to not know the results. At the birth center, the midwives trust their clients to test their own urine. You’re only supposed to show them the test stick if anything looks abnormal when you hold it up to the chart on the container that the sticks come in.

After waiting several minutes in the waiting room, a nurse came for Hubby and me, and took me to a scale. I stepped on and the scale registered my weight. I made some comment about “numbers that I don’t want to see,” and the nurse just looked at me. With my midwives, if I ever made a joke or comment about my pregnancy weight gain, they were quick to assure me that it’s normal and healthy to gain more than the doctor-recommended 20-30 pounds, that weight gain is necessary for a healthy baby, that I am gaining the right amount for my baby, etc.

Then the nurse led us to the (tiny) appointment room. There were only two places to sit—a wooden chair next to the door for Hubby, and the hospital bed with the roll of white paper on it for me. Compare this with the birth center, where we had our choice of seats—chairs, a cushy loveseat, a queen-sized bed with half-a-dozen pillows on it. Another indication of being a “patient” rather than a “client.” The nurse took my blood pressure. Then she made me lay down on my back on the bed (ouchouchouch! Where are my half-dozen pillows?) and listened to the baby’s heartbeat with a Doppler. She started to hand me a paper drape and told me I could undress from the waist down so the doctor could perform a Group B Strep test (which I had requested last time I was there, simply for the reason that I didn’t want anyone to look at my chart while I was in labor and say, “Oh, you never had a GBS test? We’ll have to pump you with antibiotics just in case”).

“Can I do the test myself?” I asked. When I was pregnant with D.L.F., I had done the test myself, and for the life of me, I couldn’t think of any good reason why the doctor was more qualified than I to stick a cotton swab in my private areas. The nurse looked a little surprised, but she agreed and handed me a tube with the swab in it. She said the doctor would be in shortly.

After a wait of fifteen or twenty minutes, the doctor arrived. I don’t remember him asking me how I was feeling. My midwives took time to find out how I was doing, both physically and emotionally. They would ask how various body parts were feeling and how various systems were functioning. They would ask me things like what I’d been doing lately, what I’d been eating, how I was doing with taking care of D.L.F., if I was dealing with anything stressful in my life. We would just chat for a while. Sometimes they would tell me stories about their own children or funny or interesting things about being a midwife. And they always gave me a back massage or foot rub with lotions or oils. The doctor, on the other hand, just asked if I’ve had any more bleeding (which I have not). Then he said he needed to get his schedule, left the room, and returned with a clipboard. He said something about it being convenient for him if I would go into labor on April 18, because he wouldn’t have much going on that day. I know he was joking, and I chuckled politely, but it rubbed me the wrong way. Then he said, “Well, if you haven’t gone into labor by 39 weeks, we’ll probably have you come in and induce you to get things started. If your placenta has moved any more, I might be okay with letting you go even a week after your due date—but probably none of my colleagues would do that.” It irritated me to hear him talk so casually about inducing, and a week before the baby is even due! Doesn’t he care that using pitocin almost always necessitates other interventions? And what if my baby isn’t ready to come out when it’s convenient for the doctor? He said himself that if my placenta gets two or more centimeters away from my cervix (it was 1.5 centimeters away when we had an ultrasound almost two weeks ago), then the risk of bleeding will be very minimal.

And to hear him say the words “I might let you…” really made me seethe, although outwardly I maintained a pleasant smile. I figured we’d better wait and see what the ultrasound shows this Thursday before I start getting assertive. The thing is, he and everyone in his office have the mentality that HE is in charge of getting this baby out of me, and I feel that it is MY responsibility. I don’t worship doctors. In fact, I don’t even trust them, as a group. I haven’t known this particular OB/GYN to long enough to find out if I trust him or not, but I’m leaning toward “not really.” I guess I would trust him to keep my baby and me alive in a dire emergency, but I don’t trust that he really cares about my long-term emotional and mental health or that how he treats me in this pregnancy (including whether or not he recommends a C-section) will affect any future pregnancies and births I may have.

A Happy Boy